The unsaid #1: The lonely mum: The world’s biggest oxymoron?
Last year in the UK almost four million babies were born.
That’s a lot of mums, with a lot of babies.
So why the hell is it that at some point or another since we had our children we’ve felt alone?
We’re all members of the biggest club in the world.
So how can it ever be for one moment that we feel isolated and lonely?
This has to be the most outrageous oxymoron ever.
We don’t have to look or go very far to find groups, clubs and classes to become part of. Even in more rural areas there’s still usually plenty going on.
When our children are older and in nursery, pre-school and school there’s a ready-made community for us to get involved with.
So if we feel lonely it’s not because of a lack of places to go where other mums hang out.
Is it because we don’t make the most of what’s available to us in terms of activities?
I don’t know about you, but every mum I know organises an incredible, carefully thought-out schedule of things to do every single week.
So I don’t reckon it’s anything to do with that.
Is it that we go along to these great places, but keep the mums we meet there at arms’ length rather than talking about the things we find tough and finding kindred spirits?
Do we do this because we feel like we should be able to cope with everything being a parent throws at us?
Do we do it because we’re scared to share with others just how afraid we are that we aren’t doing a good enough job?
Surely, this is madness!
We’re all on a level playing field.
No matter where we’ve come from and who we are, we’re all the same.
Trying to give our precious children the very best of everything.
We don’t always get it right. But we learn, and try to do better.
To me it seems crazy that there’s all this stuff going unsaid, when we all feel it.
We can all offer an understanding smile. We may not have the answers, but it helps infinitely to know someone empathises with you, doesn’t it?
I don’t know about you, but I’m going to try to be more honest about this unsaid stuff.
To myself and when I meet people.
What do you say, girls? Shall we give it a go?